Nevermind I am blind 
Perhaps it is from watching the
DVD too many times.
Blooper right
here !
Lightning : Hey , is that a pinstripe tattoo I spot there ?
Sally : What ?! *bumps into wal
instead of cones* Oww !
Lightning : Sally , you’re supposed to hit the cones
Sally : I know that , idiot
!
[size=92]Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in Piston Cup
history…
Lightning: A rookie has won the Piston Cup!
(Lightning leaps through the banner but goes too far
and lands in the crowd, squishing a tiny Mini)
Announcer: …We have a three-tonne racecar!
(everyone
laughs)
Mini (from underneath Lightning): NOT FUNNY…!![/size]
Okay
I got a couple. Are they perfect? no, but it’s the best I could come up with at 12:30 AM 
Lightning:
Turn right to go left. Hmm (Doc sees Lightning actually make the turn)
Doc: (dripping with sarcasm) I may be a
crazy Grampa car and not know much about this whole movie making scheme but I dont think that was supposed to
happen yet
Kori: Hey, are you Doc Hudson?
Doc: No! You’re not pinning this one on me!
Sally: You
called them- wait, What?
Doc: Hey, I read the script, and I’m not getting blamed for this!
Sally: But you
ARE Doc Hudson. You cant change that 
Doc: Ok well I’m Doc Hudson and now I say you’re Doc Hudson
(tags Sally) Oh how could you be so mean to him, Doc? (drives off)
Sally: Sigh
what the heck!? that was funny though. my
turn!:
Scene at the ending of the movie where Sally’s at the Wheel Well.
Sally:
Sighs
…
Director: Hey, where’s McQueen?
(Loud Laughter)
Cameras face Lightning and
Mater off stage watching a movie. The screen is showing a car version of Will Ferrel on skates next to a car
version of Jon Heder on skates.
Lightning & Mater start laughing even more.
Director: What are you
doing!?
Sally: Are you watching Blades Of Glory? OMG, I wanna watch it!
Lightning: It’s
HILARIOUS!!
Sally comes next to him to watch it. Then everyone offstage comes near them to watch it. John
Heder falls and hits a wall. Everyone starts laughing.
Director: Excuse me! We’re trying to- (starts to stare
at screen)
Everyone starts laughing including the director.
I felt like making one like this since I’m
gonna watch Blades Of Glory today. My sister watched it yesterday and said it was HILARIOUS!! Tomorrow, I’ll
tell you my opinion on it to see if it really is funny…
I CAN’T WAIT!!! 
ok, i know i told you tomorrow, but i just came back and i couldn’t wait,
IT WAS
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUNNYYYYY!!!
you HAVE to watch it!!! it was so funny, i can’t help
it!!!..
ok, this quote is just to tell you that.
Blooper:
Lightning falls into the ditch, and then a ylp of pain. The catcus
later falls on him.
Lightning: Hey, where was my stunt double? I can’t take this!
I’m not sure if these were already said, but.
(After Lightning falls into a
ditch)
Doc: Have fun fishing, Mater.
(Mater throws his hook down)
Mater: Hey, Doc! I caught a
bass!
Doc: What? Really!?!
(At the Radiator Springs race)
Sherrif: I’ve got some chicken in my
mustache. Do you want to pick it out? You can eat it if you’d like, bu-
Guido: OK!
(Offstage, toilet
flushes)
Lightning: I’m back! Are we gonna… Oh, no. You guys didn’t start without me did you?
Doc: I
think Sheriff was your understudy and…
Lightning: Don’t tell me he’s doing that chicken thing
again!
Sheriff: Uhhh…
(At the movie theater)
Mater: Lightning! I have a confession.
Lightning: What is it, Mater?
Mater: My girlfriend’s name is actually Renee’, Sally’s twin
sister.
Lightning: So?
Mater: Well, you know how tonight we was seeing "The
InCARdibles"?
Lightning: Yeah?
Mater: Well… Sally and Renee’ kinda… switched
places.
Lightning: You mea-
Mater: Yep. Sally’s breath isn’t actually minty fresh. That was Renee’s
breath.
(Lightning’s eyes well up.)
Lightning: I’m gonna be a minute.
(Drives offscreen and
sobs.)
Fillmore: I’m telling you, man, every third blink is slower.
(We see a giant Sally blinking her
eyes open and closed)
Sarge: The 60’s weren’t good to you, were they?
Fillmore: Not much better than
now.
Lizzie: Oh, Stanley. If only you could be here to see this.
Sheriff: Hope you enjoyed the
show!
Mater: I’m pneumatic insuline of seeds and methematics.
Lightning: Uhh… Mater?
Mater:
Yes?
(Silence)
Lightning: Don’t do that.
Sally: I fell in love.
Lightning: Oh.
Corvette?
Sally: No. I fell in love with this!
(Sheriff appears in front of them, doing what he was doing
when Lightning entered the hospital.)
Sheriff: Hope you enjoyed the show!
Doc: You drive like you fix
roads. Loosely.
Mater: Heh, heh.
Lightning: It’s lousy.
Doc: Ah! So you’re admitting it, now are
you?
Lightning: No! In the script! It’s not “Loosely”! It’s “Lousy”
Doc:
Oh.
Lightning: And you’re suppossed to be teaching me how to be humble.
(Red cries and knocks over
the tires)
Sally: What? Red’s not in this scene!
(Pan out to show them in Luigi’s Casa Della Tires,
when Lightning is picking his white wall out.)
John: That’s it! I’m through with cars! Is Mater the only
good actor?
(Mater is flirting with Mia & Tia.)
John: Ugh.
Those bloopers are extremely funny! Very creatvie
too Tow mater. Welcome to Pixar Planet by the way.
Quoted:
Mater: I’m pneumatic insuline of seeds and methematics.
Lightning: Uhh…
Mater?
Mater: Yes?
(Silence)
Lightning: Don’t do that.
Ok…that was great.
[size=92] 
I nearly choked on my ice cream when I
read that one.
((Atm I’m making a movie of my own outtake which I posted here earlier and I’m getting my
friends to be voice actors, lol))[/size]
Thanks.
I’m a big Cars fan, and I wasn’t sure how these were going to
be taken. So thanks for the support.
How about this:
The neon lights at Flo’s Cafe go on, and after two seconds, they go off.
Sally: “They fixed their…neon?”
Really creative A113! THanks for bringing this thread back!
Yeah, I was hoping someone would.
Good one. I cracked up.
OMG… You guys are killing me with these! Here’s one:
(At the beggining of the movie, when Lightning first comes out of his trailer)
Lightning- KACHO–OW!!! falls off ramp
Mater- Haha!
Lightning- What are you doing here? I’m not supposed to even know you in this scene. 
Mater- But… I wanted to watch tha race.
Director- Mater, go to your trailer. 
Mater- Aw, man.
LOL at both of those.
NikChik11: Ha ha! That was really clever!
Really? Well, thank you! I thought it was sorta lame after I reread it, but if you say it was clever… Thank you! Lol
Seriously, it really was! I could not have thought of that.